Today I’d like to post another submission by Jackie who wrote to me before and asked advice about feeling other people’s pain about two months ago. Today, Jackie continues to tell her story and once again asks for advice. Please write in comments your advices if you believe you can help her. My advice is after her letter. Here’s what Jackie wrote:
I wrote about my ability to feel heat from gliding my hands over a persons body. I know the heat is really pain. I can feel the size and intensity of the pain. My search for knowledge is what if anything is next. Will healing be next?
When I joined this blog I didn’t have much confidence in myself or if I was gifted. I felt like I was at a threshold peeking through a door. After reading this blog daily I’ve now entered a door and now in mid-life know that I am truly gifted.
You see, many memories are coming back to me from childhood. I’ve always just been this way and it’s never been a big deal.
The most recent memories are the tools that helped me enter the door. I grew up thinking that all kids knew who was calling when the phone rang. This is before caller ID!
When the phone rang my mother would say, “jackie, who’s calling, is it a bill collector? (at age 9, my father passed and times were rough) I thought all kids did that.
Both my father and my grand-father worked for the railroad and both were engineers. The chicken farm was a business that perhaps was started because we had a great deal of acreage.
Recently like a flash a memory came back to me. I could almost hear my mother stating for the first time, “yes, Jackie, we all know you can understand and a talk with the animals, but don’t ever tell anyone.” We had not only chickens but a small variety of barn yard animals.
We did have a wild bob-cat. I was the only person that could feed it because no one else could get close enough without being clawed. The bob-cat clawed my brothers arms so badly that blood was dripping every where.
I must have been 7 or 8 years old and only recently remembered my gift with animals. I still find that a little hard to believe but my life events are starting to fall into place now.
Again around the age of 9-10 every time my mother and I went to Sunday mass I fainted. I was always carried out to an ambulance and off to the hospital I went. I thought most kids passed out in church. The priest finally told my mother that God will understand if I don’t attend mass. Being a kid I was thrilled!
I had many brain waves. I hated them because my flaming long red hair would have glue left on it after each brain wave. It hurt so much when it was time to get combed out. Doctors of all kinds did many exams. I had physical exams tests, and even spoke with psychiatrists. No one knew the cause of fainting in church.
Can you believe that now, middle of my life it’s coming back to me? My mother stressed many times for me not to tell anyone about events I knew would happen. I cried one day because I knew she was going to be in a car accident. She was and she had a minor injury but again I was told not to tell anyone that I knew it was going to happen.
Anyone gone through anything like this?
I have memories flood my brain at times yet I can still shut them out because at times all of the information that seems to be coming to me is a bit much. My life is in turmoil right now so I feel I can’t handle a great deal.
any advice??? please??
Dear Jackie, let me give you a piece of advice on the matters you wrote in this mail. It seems to me you have a lot of fear gathered in you about your abilities. Most probably this fear was “planted” into you by your mother when you were a kid. Just like you wrote above, she asked you not to tell anyone. These oppressed feelings and the fear that your mother must have felt given your extraordinary abilities have been with you all your life. And now, when your gift returns, so return your fear. I my opinion you need to do several things:
First, during a quite time alone, enter a meditative state… close your eyes and imagine your mother coming to you. In this visualization talk to her and forgive her for these fears that she put into you when you were young. Tell her that you understand her and forgive her. See how she accepts your apology and feel good about it. This seemingly simple meditation can have great relieving effect on you and will help you accept yourself as well. You might want to repeat this meditation with other people in your life who somehow need your forgiveness. It is very liberating.
Second, you need to accept this gift of yours and be happy that you have it. You can help people more easily and better than most other people. Yes, I think that healing might be a good choice for you but that’s something that you have to decide for yourself, since helping other people is not easy as well. You can find a great selection of books on healing or some healing modalities that “talk” to you. Looks like energy healing techniques might be best because of your current extra-sensory abilities. So, look for Quantum Touch, Reiki, Qi-Gong and similar techniques. I’ve written before about Quantum Touch and there are lots of instructors in the USA.
If you have a lot of emotion and fear, you might want to learn the easy to use EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) which is truly great for letting go of unwanted emotions and fears. Read my review of EFT.
I hope this will get you started, Jackie. Let me know if you need further help and I hope some other readers will be able to help you as well.
All the best,